Most are search terms that have to do with my name or the name of the blog, which are clearly people who love me and my writing so much that they haven't added my url to their favourites. However, there are a number of super-funny ones that I'll share here.
1. Shress - Any loyal reader knows what this is. If you don't, just know it's the bane of my existence. A post about shresses early on in my blogging career brings continued traffic. Related search terms: what do you wear under a shress, wear stilettos and take it up the ass, 11 year olds wearing stilettos
2. Completely Hairless People - It makes me giggle a little to know that some poor schmuck looking for others who bear his terrible affliction of complete hairlessness happened upon my nascent concerns about waxing "down there".
3. White Tights Male Dancers - Not sure what this person was ACTUALLY looking for (or if it was academic rather than recreational interest that spurred their search in the first place), but I'm sure they were upset to find, not the answer, but the ramblings of a sexually frustrated 20-something who kept getting distracted from the skill and story involved in The Nutcracker Ballet by the bulges in the male dancers' tights.
4. Why did people ware capes - This person was so upset not to find the answer to his question that he felt the need to admonish me for my verbosity (rather than brush up on his google skills). On the up-side, talkin' ass bitch is my new favourite insult.
So...there...hopefully this time I got it right?
I was thinking that maybe my funny was coming out as bitchy. Was it? Sorry. My neurosis has a mind of its own sometimes. I'm so glad you played. You're always invited. We even have a spare room if you don't mind futons. Or my obnoxious cats.
ReplyDeletexo
I was thinking that maybe my complete lack of self-esteem was coming out as funny. Wasn't it? Oops.
ReplyDeleteNo, I knew it was a funny. I will gladly play with your obnoxious cats. Any time. Maybe I can bring mine.
I feel as though the victim of Number 2 probably found exactly what he was looking for.
ReplyDelete"White Tights Male Dancers" is my favorite search term up there. Sounds like a very sad dance troupe. Or a foreign one with a very poor English translation.
ReplyDeleteI find it amusing some person would comment on their failed google search. It takes all kinds I guess.
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